“No, I’m fine. Thank you for asking. Just been a long day. You know what I mean.”
He ran his hand through his tousled hair, those amber eyes tearing me apart, but thankfully he didn’t push me. “I understand perfectly. Today was one of my more trying since taking the crown.” He leaned in closer to me then, with a mischievous glint in his eye. “So Gerald tells me you’re ready to have this affair, earn the title our people are bestowing on us.” His half-smile grew, the depth of his eye color deepening. Clearly he found this amusing, and I couldn’t hold in my own laughter.
“You wish,” I said playfully.
His face went dead serious in a millisecond. “Every day, Arianna.”
I was pretty sure I stopped breathing then. Heat sizzled down my body and settled into my core. “The fae prince of the Summer Court visited me!” I blurted out, desperate to change the subject.
Kade’s face turned lethal. “When? Why didn’t you call for me? Are you okay?” He scanned my body as if looking for injuries.
I hugged my arms to keep from touching him. Why did this have to be so hard? I didn’t want to feel this way forever. It was too much.
“I’m fine. He gave me a warning though.”
“A warning?” Kade’s voice was husky as he awaited my reply.
I nodded, bobbing my head like a creepy doll. “I need to fix the mecca and send the stolen energy back to the Otherworld, or the Summer Court and all their people and food will die off. If that happens, the Winter Court will come to Earth, kill us all, and take over.”
He forced a smile, but it was more bared teeth. “No big deal, right?”
I huffed. “Right! So I‘m here, with my mecca expert, asking for help.”
Kade’s eyes twinkled. “Mecca expert, huh?”
I shook my head at him. “Don’t let it go to your head. I had to say something to convince him there was a shot at keeping his entire race from dying out. At least now the Summer Court is still holding onto some hope that we can fix this, which means they continue to battle our enemy and slow their takeover of Earth.”
I bit my bottom lip, which was a bad habit from when I was younger. Kade’s eyes darkened as he followed that movement. Crap. I knew there was a reason to not bite my lips, it created cliché moments like this where kissing that damn bear was all I could think about. I needed to squash this before it could heat up and get us both into more trouble with our people.
Freeing my lip, I said in a rush, “Just forget that kiss, okay? It was a mistake.” The words hurt more than I thought they would, and when his face hardened and eyes went flat, I wanted to take them back.
“Arianna,” he said slowly, “for as long as I live, I will never forget kissing you.”
Then, for some stupid hormonal idiotic reason, my eyes filled with tears. The hard planes of Kade’s face softened and he reached for me, but knowing if he touched me I’d completely break apart, I shook off some of my agony and schooled my face, faking a coughing fit. I ran for the house.
Finn was right with me. What are you doing?
I took a hard right, and through pure luck found the bathroom right off the sitting room. Finn and I snaked inside and I locked the door as a new wave of tears fell down my face.
I huddled closer to my familiar. I have no idea what’s wrong with me, I wailed through our mental connection. I think it’s the stress. I didn’t think being queen would be this hard.
My best friend peered up at me with wise yellow eyes.
If you’re being truly honest, it’s not being queen that’s much harder than you expected. It’s falling for the bear king.
I let that truth settle into my head and heart. He was right in some ways. I definitely liked Kade – he was gorgeous, funny, a good kisser, and powerful. But so were Ben, Victor, and Blaine, and a lot of other guys – wolf-shifter-guys who were available to me. I just needed to focus my flirting and energy on a man I could actually have. Damn that treeling for giving me even one second of hope. Hope was a strange thing. Once it found its way into your heart, your soul, it was almost impossible to get it out. But it was a false hope and I’d do well to remember that.
“Arianna, open the door.”
Kade’s heavy fist fell against the bathroom door. I could sense his impatience and worry. He banged again, the heavy wooden door rattling on its poor abused hinges.
“Hang on,” I said, with a bit of snarl. I would not fall apart in front of him again. Walking to the sink, I washed my hands and splashed water on my face, before patting it dry with a clean, folded hand towel.
Once I was satisfied that my face looked like I hadn’t been crying, I knelt and looked Finn in the eyes. No more talk of caring for the bear king. I will not be remembered as the queen who chose a fling over her duty and people.
Because I was starting to think that’s what the Red Queen had done, and look where that had left us all – completely screwed and at the mercy of a race far stronger than us. I would not let this thing with Kade become anything real. I was done. Today. Now.
I tore open the bathroom door to find Kade standing right on the other side. He had not moved an inch from when he was banging. The intensity he was exuding almost knocked me on my butt.
“Are you okay?” he asked, not backing up even an inch. His tone was all business, but his eyes were not. They were warm and caressing.
“I’m fine. Just had an attack of allergies.”
He didn’t move. This was it. Now or never, I had to choose: my heart or my people. The next words came out in a strangled rush. “Kade, there’s something I need to tell you.”