To make matters worse, Jackson was clearly enthusiastic about joining the Alliance. He listened to all of Beau’s plans with interest, and even offered suggestions of his own that would help bring in more wolves and make them feel at ease.
So now I was being the downer and the party pooper. Figured.
Jackson had deferred to me, though. He’d told Bathsheba and Beau that we wouldn’t move forward with the Alliance unless we were both firmly on board. They’d been disappointed but understanding. I got the sense that Jackson was a bit disappointed, too, but he’d said nothing of the sort.
And now we were driving back to the Savage house, an uncomfortable silence in the truck as I drove. I glanced over at him. “You think I’m making a mistake, don’t you? Saying no to the Alliance?”
He regarded me. “I would never tell you that you’re making a mistake, Alice. The pack has been yours for a lot longer than it’s been mine. But I do think it’d be good for all of us.”
“Why? We don’t need outsiders.” It was what my father - and Cash - had firmly believed. I’d grown up with the knowledge that Savages took care of their own, and that was that.
“You needed me,” Jackson said easily.
I shot him an angry look, but he was gazing out the window of the passenger side of the truck. “That so?”
“Not saying it to start a fight, Alice,” Jackson said. “Just pointing it out.”
I glared out the window, my hands clenched tight on the steering wheel. I didn’t like being reminded that I’d been forced to crawl to an outsider for protection.
“My old pack,” Jackson began softly. “They died in a fire. Did Dan tell you that?”
I swallowed hard at the pain in his voice. “No. No one told me.”
“Yeah. My father’s the alpha of a pack in the northeast, so I couldn’t stay there. Didn’t want to challenge my dad for dominance and all, you know? So eventually an alpha has to move on. I went to the Carolinas and hooked up with the St. James pack. Three men, two women, and Dan was the youngest. They were kind of poor. Actually, ‘kind of’ is being nice about it. They all lived in this big ramshackle house that would have probably been condemned if anyone would have reported them to the city. It was falling down around their ears, but it was out in the country and they were happy. Even though I was only about twenty-four or so when I joined up with them, I was the alpha. The others were all older than me except for Dan, but I was the one with the best job. My dad had taught me to be a plumber, and that was fancy to them.” His mouth twisted a bit. “They were a bit of a mess, looking back, but the nicest people. I loved being there with them. I was there for five years.”
Two females. I wanted to ask if one of them had been his alpha female. If they’d been romantic together. If she was pretty.
“I mentioned the house was a mess, right? It was. Something was always going wrong with it - a circuit would short, or the air conditioner would break down, something would overheat, you name it. We joked that I was a great plumber but a piss-poor electrician, and that the next person let into the pack would have to know how to rig wiring to keep the old place going.” He chuckled, but the sound was pained.
I said nothing, a knot in my throat at the ache in his words. It reminded me of the losses I’d gone through. Of losing my father and mother, and then Cash just a few years later. Losing Carlos, my omega. Our little pack had been hit and hit again. I knew what it was like to grieve.
“Dan liked to run off in the middle of the night and change into his wolf. Just for fun, you know? Kid sneaking out and being a kid. He had a lot more energy than the rest of them, being a lot younger. I figured it out one night and thought I’d sneak up on him in the woods. Scare some sense into him. Which, it did, I suppose. But I also didn’t realize it’d save our lives. We got back to the house in the middle of the night only to see the entire thing had gone up in flames. Everyone inside was still asleep.”
I glanced over and watched him out of the corner of my eye. “I’m sorry.”
He ran a hand down his face. “They went peacefully. Or so I’m told. Fire department said the smoke inhalation probably got them before the flames did. And it was faulty wiring in the old house, so no one was to blame. But it left Dan an orphan and me without a pack. Or a home. And after that, we couldn’t stay there, so we left. Headed across the south. Been wandering for, what, ten, twelve months now.” He shrugged. “It’s lonely when you have no one. You don’t realize how dependent you are on having the support of a pack until you have no one. Then you realize just how alone you are. That’s why I want the Alliance for your pack - for our pack. So they never have to go through what Dan and I did. So they’re never alone, despite whatever comes their way. So they always have someone to fall back on.”
I said nothing. I could have argued that I’d always be there for them, but I thought Cash would always be there for me, and one twist of fate had robbed me of both brother and alpha. Life struck and you had to cope.
But leaning against others? Non-wolves? It went against everything I knew. “I…I’ll think about it.”
“I know, Alice. I’m not trying to pressure. I’m just trying to explain why I feel the way I do.”
I understood. I just had to figure out if it was best for the pack. If we joined the Alliance, other wolves might see us as weak. Needing support. I didn’t want that for my wolves. I wanted them to be strong and independent.
But when I pulled up into the driveway of the Savage house, all thoughts about independence and Alliances and anything else flew out of my mind. Trina was on the porch, her young face wet with tears.
“The baby’s gone,” she told me, and burst into sobs.
Fear seized me. My mind went blank, and then I started to shake. “What do you mean, the baby’s gone?”
“I mean he’s missing. I took a nap on the couch,” she said tearfully, “with him in his playpen and the next thing I knew, I woke up and he was gone.”
“Where are Spence and Len?” My voice was shaking. Baby Eddie was so little, so vulnerable. “They’re supposed to be here with you. Did they grab him?”
“They went to a concert. I’m not supposed to tell you.” She began to cry all over again.
Fury exploded behind my eyes. So Spence and Len had disobeyed me to go to a concert? And now the baby was gone?
Roscoe had taken him. I just knew it. He was going to use sweet, innocent baby Eddie as a bargaining chip. I was shaking, I was so furious. “Did you smell anyone else in the house?”
“No.” She shook her head. “Just me and the baby.”
“You need to go up to the panic room,” I told her, my voice hard. “Go up there and stay there until I give you the order to come out.”
“But—“
“Go!” I barked at her.
“Go on up, Trina,” Jackson soothed, and pulled the girl into a hug. “It’s okay. Alice and I are going to get the baby back, all right? Don’t you worry.”
For a wild, irrational moment, I was jealous of that hug and the way she collapsed against him. Then she nodded and raced into the house.
Jackson turned to me, and put his hands on my shoulders. “Calm down, Alice. It’s going to be okay.”
“I’m calm,” I said, though I couldn’t seem to stop shaking. Baby Eddie was with Roscoe. Vulnerable, sweet baby Eddie who didn’t have all his teeth and only gurgled and cooed. Who sprouted fur when he wanted to challenge someone and just as easily lifted his arms for a hug. Sweet, sweet baby Eddie was with that monster.
All because I’d wanted someone else to be alpha for my pack. It was my fault. If he was hurt, I’d never forgive myself.
“Alice,” Jackson said.
I barely heard him through the muddle of my own thoughts. What if Eddie had tried, in his baby way, to challenge Roscoe? What if he was crying and Roscoe tried to shut him up? Would he hurt the baby? Was Eddie scared? I—
“Alice,” Jackson said again, and his gaze caught mine. His eyes were greenish gold, his wolf rising to the front, and there was a challenge in his voice that made my wolf sit up and pay attention. I locked onto his gaze, felt his alpha begin to subvert mine. “It’s going to be okay,” he said again in a slow voice. “We’re going to take care of it, all right?”
“What do we do?” I whispered.
“If Roscoe has the baby, he’s going to want to trade him for one of the girls, or for you,” he said, echoing my own thoughts. Hearing it spoken aloud made me tremble with fury all over again. “We’re not going to let that happen,” he said calmly. “I promise. But I want you to go upstairs for now—“
My eyes narrowed. “What?”
“Go upstairs and guard Trina,” he told me. “We don’t know that he’s not coming back after her, and I want her to be safe. You have a gun, right?”
I did. I nodded.
“I’m going to make a few calls. We’ll bring in others and canvas the woods. We’ll find his trail and we’ll make him give the baby back. I promise.”
“But…who can we call?” I thought of the other packs in the area. The others weren’t close, and we didn’t talk with them much. Wolves didn’t like to mix with wolves that weren’t in their packs. It didn’t happen. Too many territory disputes. If you asked for help, you risked ceding territory because you clearly couldn’t protect it. “Who do we trust?”
“Do you trust me?” Jackson asked.
I blinked at him, then nodded. I did. Jackson wanted what was best for us.
He leaned in and gave me a fierce kiss. “Then go get the gun and guard Trina. I’m calling the Alliance.”
~~ * ~~
Within a half hour, the Savage house was crawling with wolves, were-cougars, and every other creature I could think of. The front yard had turned into a parking lot, full of cars parked haphazardly on the lawn, as more and more shifters arrived to hunt for the baby. I was shocked at how many had turned out, and my nostrils filled with the scents of were-bear, were-otter, and some I couldn’t even name.