"But she sent you. She sent you anyway."
"She's queen." His smile turned gentle, as if Kai had said something mildly foolish. "And she's immortal. A few hundred years isn't long to her. She'd expect me to understand and accept the necessity, and she'd be right. Ilke couldn't be allowed to live. With death magic empowering him and none here able to oppose him, he could have done terrible harm to your world. And those in the thirteen realms needed to know he'd be found and punished."
"How would they know? You didn't find him until years after the Earth was closed to them."
His eyebrows lifted. "The Winter Queen announced she'd set her hound on his trail. Those of Faerie wouldn't need to be present at the kill to know it happened."
A touch of arrogance there. No, more than a touch. "Are you unstoppable, then?"
"Short of death, yes, and hellhounds are difficult to kill. There are few who can manage it."
"A part-sidhe mage pumped up on death magic wouldn't be one of those few."
His gray eyes warmed with amusement. "As you see, he was not."
"Good point." To her surprise, a yawn overtook her. "Wow. Didn't think I could relax enough to be sleepy, but I am. I don't suppose you've got a toothbrush in one of those sacks?"
"Of course." He stretched out a hand and retrieved one of the grocery bags. "Breakfast is in the other bag - fruit, bread, and peanut butter. I didn't get anything for coffee or tea, I'm afraid."
"I'll tough it out." She dug through the sack he'd handed her. Soap, a washcloth and towel, sunscreen, paper plates and cups, deodorant, tampons - tampons! Her usual brand, too, which she assumed he'd seen in her bathroom at some point. She shook her head, smiling. She didn't need them at the moment, but if she was as punctual as usual, she'd want them in another two days.
How many men would have even thought of tampons?
There was also antibacterial ointment, toothbrushes, toothpaste, contact lens solution, and a roll of toilet paper. She took it out, frowning. "With that water you brought I can brush my teeth over the sink in the kitchen, but I'm not using this bathroom."
"You'll want to go outside. I need to set the wards to let you pass anyway, so we'll do that. But first I need to check the area." He stood.
The wards.
While Nathan scouted around outside, Kai thought about those mysterious wards. Once he'd determined that the area was safe, he had her stand in the doorway with her hands outstretched while he loped around the house again. That was to somehow mix her energy with his so she could pass through his wards.
When he was done she went out and took care of necessities in the concealing darkness. She came back in and brushed her teeth and washed her face in the kitchen using the bottled water as sparingly as she could - with a tiny bubble of mage light posted to her shoulder. And she thought about Nathan.
To protect her, he'd tossed aside everything. From what she could tell, he hadn't felt an instant of doubt or regret for that decision. She knew the colors of those emotions, the way they muddied thoughts. Nathan's colors remained as clear and true as ever.
The hunt, he'd said, was part of him the way her hands were part of her. She suspected he needed the kill at its end, too, at least sometimes. He'd learned to do without that, but when he spoke of a true hunt, he meant to the death.
He was a killer.
He was the most honest person she'd ever met. He was rare, kind, practical, sometimes too serious, and... and innocent. It was an odd word to use for someone hundreds of years old and experienced in ways she couldn't even guess at, but it fit. There was no taint to Nathan.
He'd bought her tampons. Somehow that summed everything up for her.
When Kai finished washing and brushing and went back to the living room, he'd unrolled the sleeping bags. They lay primly side by side in the middle of the room. She paused. "I smell smoke."
"I disposed of the papers and such from supper. Best not to tempt the mice."
She couldn't agree more. Kai walked up to him and put her hand on his chest. His heart beat slow and steady, but his eyebrows lifted in surprise and his colors warmed. He looked at her, waiting.
"You should have put our sleeping bags together."
"I don't expect to sleep. Are you cold? I can warm the air in here, but it will take power I'd rather save for greater need."
She shook her head. "I'm not talking about sleeping, Nathan."
"Kai - "
"You didn't turn me down because you couldn't risk the distraction. Your wards will tell you if anything comes close enough to be a threat. If you have another reason for not making love with me now, tell me what it is."
For a long moment he said nothing, but his thoughts sped up and a rosy hue brightened the purple they swam in. And his heart beat faster. "You're right," he said at last. "I'm afraid. I hadn't realized that."
"Okay." She nodded. "Good. So am I." And she reached for his head and put her hands behind it, went up on tiptoe, and kissed him.
His lips were warm and, for two difficult seconds, completely still. Then he quivered. And exploded.
His arms took over, binding her tightly to him. He wanted his mouth everywhere, not just on hers. He kissed her chin, the crest of her cheek, and licked her ear, then kissed her eyes closed and ran the tip of his tongue along the base of the lashes. Then returned to her mouth. "Beautiful, beautiful," he crooned, his breath soft and warm against her lips. "So beautiful."
It was true. Nathan never lied. Under the glory of his hands coursing her back, her arms, her hips, with his mouth making magic on her skin, she was beautiful. She tried to tell him the same with her mouth and hands - that he was splendid, glorious, and hers. Hers. In this moment, if only for this moment, he was hers.
"A moment," he said, tearing his mouth away to lean his forehead against hers. His breath came fast. "It's been so long... I need a moment, or my control - "
"Nathan." She cupped his face in her two hands. "Will you hurt me? If you turn loose of your bloody control, is there any chance you would hurt me?"
His eyes were so dark, the pupils dilated. So intent. He shook his head once, his eyes never losing their focus on her. "But it's been so long. I don't... expectations are different than they used to be. I want to do right by you."
Her breath huffed out. "You don't have to do this right. There is no right way because there is no wrong way, not between us. Do you understand? You can't do this wrong."
"Oh." He blinked. "Oh!" And he laughed, delighted, and the sound of it was young and beautiful. Beautiful. "I see. Of course. You're wise, Kai. My Kai." The possessive came out fierce, startling her for an instant - just long enough for him to sweep her into his arms.
He laid her on one of the sleeping bags and crouched over her on hands and knees, tugging off her jacket, then her shirt - a stretchy knit, which was good, because he was not patient with the fabric. And kissing her, kissing whatever part of her his mouth happened to be near as he stripped her.
She was hard put to keep up, but she managed to get his shirt off and his pants unzipped before he yanked her jeans off. And her panties. And her bra. He moved her hands aside and finished stripping himself with the same ruthless efficiency he'd used on her. Her eyes widened briefly as he removed the sheath on his leg - a sheath and a knife she hadn't known was there.
Then he lay down beside her and held her, just held her, pressing skin to skin, touching her hair, her breasts, and whispering to her - English words like "soft" and "beautiful." Words in other languages - French, Spanish, what might be Russian. Words in tongues she'd never heard or heard of.
Her name sounded the same in all of them.
Her hands acquainted themselves with him, too - sandpaper skin on his cheeks, where his beard was growing. Softer skin on his flanks and bottom, coarse hair on thighs tight with muscle. The fascinating flex of muscles in his back and shoulders as he stroked her.
Need pooled in her belly. When his lips closed over her nipple, the liquid tugging turned her as hasty as a kid waking up on Christmas morning. "Now," she said, and, "Oh, yes," as he played with her. "Oh, lovely. Yes. But now, Nathan." She wrapped her hand around him, hard and twitching, and he trembled.
But he wasn't finished. He told her so, and he found more places to touch, turning her on her side, lifting her leg, exploring her until she trembled and clutched him and panted. Before panting turned to cursing - barely before - steady, imperturbable Nathan suddenly shook all over. He flipped her onto her back and centered himself over her and drove home.
With his second stroke, she exploded. On the third, he did, too.
Eons later they lay in the crumpled dark with breaths and legs tangled together, the one still quick, the other limp. Kai found enough wind to say, "I always thought that was an old wives' tale. And I didn't do it myself, either."
"What?" He stroked her hair.
"I've gone blind."
He choked on a laugh. "No, but the mage light... you were right, but so was I. Normally keeping it going is automatic, but I was distracted for a few moments there at the end. Extremely distracted."
The light bounced back into being, but muted now, no more than a candle glow hovering over his shoulder. She could see him smiling at her, and that was good. He'd invented a truly lovely smile this time.
But she'd already known he was happy. His colors were so bright. She smiled back, loving him.
"Sleep." He touched her cheek and sat up.
"Wait. Where are you going?"
"Nowhere." He reached for his pants. "But I need to stay alert, and I won't if I lie beside you."
"I'm not..." But a yawn caught her, making a lie of what she'd been about to say, so she finished wryly,"... not going to argue, I guess. But you'll need to sleep, too."