Kiera’s heart was so full by the end. She didn’t know Callum, but he was probably the reason Beast turned out okay. Even though she’d never met the gorilla, a piece of her adored him for what he survived and for giving a troubled shifter a home and a future. For finding his own happiness. “What is your given name?” she asked softly.
Beast shook his head. “Doesn’t matter.”
It stung a little he wouldn’t share that part with her, but it was unfair of her heart to demand so much so soon. He’d already shared more than she ever thought a man like him would be able to.
“I like the name Beast. It suits you. And I don’t mind your scars like you think I do. If I stare, it’s because I think your face is interesting.”
Now only four feet separated them. Beast avoided her gaze, but he stooped and picked up another stick, handed it to her, but didn’t let go of his end. They walked along like that, holding the branch between them. It was the most intimate moment she’d ever shared with another person.
“I think your face is interesting, too. And your purple hair and your nose ring and your lips—” A growl blasted from him, and he dropped his end of the stick. He placed his hands behind his back again. He tried to put another couple of feet between them but she chased him and kept their distance the same.
He cast her a quick sideways smile. It looked shy. Shy? Were his cheeks red, too? Now her cheeks felt hot. This man was something else.
Suddenly, he drew to a stop in front of her, halting her in her tracks. The grin had fallen from his lips, and he searched her face. “I didn’t kill them.” He ran his hand over his short hair and looked off with a confused expression. “Or maybe I did, I don’t know, because I didn’t do enough to save them. They were mine to protect, and I failed them instead.”
Kiera’s eyes stung with tears at the bone-deep loss Beast had endured. His pride had been killed, and he carried the guilt. “Is that why you let the rumors go? Is that why you never told anyone differently?”
When he looked back at her, his face was a fearsome mask, but his eyes were so clear, so blue, so full of pain. He nodded once. His nose twitched in a pissed-off lion expression. “I deserve the rumors.”
Before she could change her mind, Kiera threw her arms around his waist and held on as tight as she could. Ignoring the long snarl that vibrated through his body, she rested her head on his chest and stared off into the woods until, little by little, the tension left his body, and the snarl turned to a soft, almost inaudible content sound.
He cupped the back of her head gently, as if he thought she would turn to dust and float away on the breeze. His other hand pressed softly onto her lower back, and he rested his cheek on the top of her head. “Don’t cry, Kiera. I’m not pitiful either.”
Was she crying? She sniffed and took stock of her body. Her cheeks stung where her tears had chilled in the cold wind, and her shoulders were shaking. Oh, she knew what he was saying. She’d told him she was strong instead of weak earlier, and he’d just done the same with her.
Something gray blurred by, snatched the stick out of her hand, and bolted away. Startled, Kiera lurched back, then laughed at the retreating dog with the giant stick hanging out of his mouth.
Beast took a quick step toward the dog, but Kiera grabbed his hand. “Let him have it, Beast. It’s just a stick.”
“Just a stick,” he murmured with a frown in his voice.
Beast stood still like a hunting predator, his lightening eyes trained on the dog as it disappeared into the woods.
“Whose dog is that?”
“That little fucker belongs to no one. He’s supposed to be Kane’s, but he runs wild up here. Name’s Gray Dog. Smells like a sewer rat.”
Kiera snorted, and when Beast cast her a confused look, she cracked up. “That was funny.”
Beast looked down between them, where their hands were still clasped. “I’m not a toucher.”
“Right.” She snatched her hand away and hid her disappointment by looking back toward Kane’s house. “Sorry, it was just a reaction. I’m not a toucher either.”
Beast’s blond eyebrows drew down slightly. “Truth.” His voice sounded surprised. “I thought since you were human, you would be needy, like Emma.”
“Emma’s a wolf,” Kiera argued, turning them to the incline that led to Kane’s house.
“Only recently. She needs petting all the time. Winter, too. So do Dustin and Logan and Kane and Rowan. Everybody’s lost their goddamned minds up here. PDA everywhere. Can’t escape it ever.”
“You just hugged me back,” Kiera said cheerfully, walking backward in front of him. “Did you hate that?”
Beast cracked a smile. “Yes. It was gross.”
“Oh, super-gross,” Kiera played along. “Bleh, hugs and affection, who wants that?”
“Not me,” Beast said, but he was chuckling now. “Truthfully, I never did, though. You haven’t lived in a pride, so you don’t know what it’s like.”
“For alpha males?”
Beast nodded thoughtfully, his gaze on the woods as he followed her along slowly. “Females don’t need the affection. Don’t want it. They want to be taken care of during their heat cycles, and then it’s back to being friends.”
Nope, she didn’t like the sound of him fucking his females through their heat cycles. She’d had a couple of estrus cycles before she’d been cleansed, and she’d been a hormonal little heathen, wanting to be touched three times a day until it was through. The vision of Beast screwing other girls made her hands claw up, but then she thought about what he’d really admitted. “So you’re saying you’ve never made love to a woman?”